Marriage | Building a Beacon of Hope

The following is a letter we received from a man who wanted to share the glorious transformation of his walk with the Lord, his marriage, and the relationship with his children.

Dear Ken Nair, 

I am a blessed man. The past three years have been a great source of inspiration and encouragement. I would like to share with you some of the things that have changed my life as a result of my involvement with the Christ-Quest Institute.

1.  Understanding, for the first time, what my spirit is and how that understanding affects my walk with the Father, as well as others. To think that at my age (50) I had never heard or understood what my spirit was so that I could identify it at any given time, and try to understand what the Father was trying to communicate to me. This has been revolutionary for me. In my thinking emotions and spirituality had no connection. How sad that this was my view for so long. But, how liberating and freeing that I can now understand my spirit, and from that develop a closer walk with God. Hallelujah!

2. The second major thing that I learned in my three years is what my flesh is and what it looks like. I actually thought that my flesh was sensual and sexual stuff, and of course I did not have a problem with it. How wrong and deceived I was. It is nearly two years now that I started to realize that either you were lying, or I was totally clueless about what my flesh looked like. I figured I had better err on the side of me being wrong and began in earnest to ask the Father to show me what my flesh looked like. Of course you know that is what He wants to do, and so I have had many, many, many answers to that prayer. I suspect that I will have many more.

3. The third major thing that affected me is a much closer walk with the Father. My prayer life has changed dramatically as communion with Him is so real and personal. Of all the things I have learned and applied, this is the most precious to me. Our class leader would often ask me to consider what I was experiencing and how that affected the Father’s heart. And also, how much Christ could identify with my pain at that moment, because of the suffering He experienced. To be able to communicate with Him, know He hears me, and then to have Him respond back is almost beyond belief or words. His grace so amazes me.

4. Relationships: Whether with my children, with siblings or strangers, there has been great improvement here. Learning how to better understand others, give grace more freely and also to express more care and love has been life changing.

There were so many, many more benefits and blessings that I have received, that I believe I could write a book and still not cover it all. Understanding and being freed from legalism is huge for me. Understanding anger — its roots and cure. Seeing the Father change my life and seeing Him change the lives of others.

Far beyond the uniqueness and freshness of the message, as good as that was/is, I believe the attitudes expressed in the delivery were even more powerful. I grew up in a Christian home, spent two years in Bible college, and was always very active in leadership in an evangelical church. Despite that, I have never witnessed humility expressed as I have seen these last three years. I have never before seen Christ-likeness in person like I have during this time.

I am at a good place. I am so excited about my walk with the Father. I just wish I could know that everyone is experiencing Him as I do now. I know I am just beginning. I know I have a huge distance to go if the Lord tarries. I am aware now, more than ever, that when I compare my life with Christ, I come up way short. Even as I write this, it is possible for me to struggle with my flesh.

Ken, in that first Discovery Seminar, when you said I was 100% responsible for the failure of my marriage, I had a hard time swallowing that. I had read your book prior, but it still seemed like a pretty extreme statement. I have been through some pretty severe trials these last ten years. However, I have in these last few years been able to see “golden railroad spikes.” In fact, I have benefited from discovering a very powerful one within the last month, or so. God has changed my heart in so many ways. I am so grateful.

I truly believe that only heaven itself will be able to display the riches of harvest that you have sown in my life. Again, I am so grateful that I could share this part of my journey under your tutelage. I am looking forward to the “Senior Freshman” class. You, Ken Nair, are a hero to me.

Your friend in Christ, Mark Diffenderfer

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